August 26, 2023: Parashat Torah Portion Ki Teitzei
This week’s Parashah Torah Portion Ki Teitzei is taken from Deuteronomy 21:10-25:19. Join Dr. Jeffery Myers, as he introduces the prospect of romance on the battlefield. Passion versus Values principle are key in all of this! As it says in Proverbs 4:23 "Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it."
Follow along in the AUDIO PODCAST, by clicking on the play button below, and reading along with the notes, as you listen to today's Parashah Torah Portion:
Lion of Judah Speaks: Parashah Torah Portion Ki Teitzei - Deuteronomy 21:10-25:19
Last week’s Torah portion spelled out certain laws of conduct for warfare. This week it introduces the prospect of romance on the battlefield. A soldier in a heathen army would have no problem overtaking, raping and disposing of a women captive but not in the army of Adonai. Torah acknowledges that the soldiers of a conquering army are likely to be tempted to take captive women, but it forbids acting on impulse. Passion versus Values principle! You can have both but just wait and choose well. The Torah tells us that the woman shall be granted dignity and honor. She is allowed to mourn her parents; she is allowed to be given the honor of marriage, she is not to be taken forcibly, she is to married and given the status of wife, she cannot be treated as a slave, nor can she be sold. Before a conquering soldier can consummate his desire and marry the woman, he has to allow her to mourn the loss of her family for a full month. During this period, she is to shave her head and let her fingernails grow. Let’s look a little deeper…Torah laws are attempting to dissuade the man from marrying the captive woman by altering her appearance so as to not make her attractive to him.
Does he really want to marry this woman? At the end of 30 days if the answer is no---he is to let her go free! What is this torah portion telling us in its wisdom that can apply to every romantic relationship? It is telling us that a person should never rush into marriage! Love at first sight is not real! Before committing to marriage, a person needs to take time to see past the other person’s sexual allure and the fog of lust. Prov. 31:30 says, “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears Adonai is to be praised.” These laws teach us to curb our natural desires and remember that the person we are attracted to is, after all, another human being not an object. These laws teach us that sex before marriage is NEVER sanctioned! Even the battlefield soldier must delay gratification 30 days until the wedding document was signed.
Character and deeds come to play in Deut. 22:9-11. A popular proverbial lore about love and marriage says, “Opposites attract.” However, marriage counselors who have the unpleasant job of trying to reconcile polarized marriages disagree. And so does the Bible.
Torah says: We are not to plow with an ox and donkey yoked together. We are not to plant a field with two different types of seed. We are not to make garments out of two different types of linen and wool knit together. Each of these commandments illustrates an important principle about relationships. Read II Cor. 6:1-16…Paul interprets the prohibition of yoking two different types of animals together metaphorically as a prohibition against partnering with an unbeliever.
The world says that a person should marry someone he or she falls in love with which is a bad idea. WHAT? Yes, it is possible to fall in love with the wrong person. If you allow yourself to be emotionally invested in a person, marriage is likely to happen. II Cor. 6:17-19 days, “Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith Adonai, and touch not the unclean thing, and I will receive you. And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith Adonai Almighty.” A person should be extremely reluctant to marry someone who is not of the same religious persuasion. Disciples must not consider marriage to someone who is not a believer and a follower of Messiah Yeshua. To do so would be unevenly yoked!
A true disciple of Yeshua should not even consider marrying a marginal believer. We need to deal wisely with unwanted desires. We need to in this instance…see the future! We never are supposed to marry a person because of attraction which is based on flesh and surface attraction. Where is your shared goal in life? You didn’t get to know them at all. Sometimes people are together and one wants to learn and convert (for lack of a better word). While this can happen, organically as both parties grow in appreciation of one’s beliefs, if this conversion wasn’t there before the relationship, then there is real cause for concern.
If a couple marries for superficial reasons, there is likely disharmony. This will affect children born from this union. Some couples are selfish and only think of themselves in the relationship. When you look into the future ask yourself, “Will this person be a good role model for my children?”, “Will they want the same kind of family and household I do?” Ask questions…When you start to look into the future and think about the ramifications of your actions…you become wise! That’s one reason a wise person can “see the future.”
Let’s do a spiritual exercise: Think of one or two decisions you’ve made in the past, and the ramifications of those decisions. Ask yourself if you could perhaps have better foreseen the outcome?
Man in Hebrew is “ish”, spelled with an aleph, yud and shin. Aleph means strong leader, Yud means divine point, Elohim’s omnipresence and Shin means sharp, press and to eat. Yud represents the quality of maleness. Woman in Hebrew is “ishah:, spelled Aleph, Shin, and Heh. Aleph meaning strong leader, Shin meaning sharp, press and eat. Heh means Presence of Elohim, El Shaddai protects. Heh represents the quality of femaleness. Except for these differences males and females are spiritually identical. They are both esh, a word that means fire in Hebrew.
When they marry, man contributes a “Yud” to the union, and woman contributes a {Heh”, forming between them “YUD HEH” …Yah, one of the holy names of Elohim. The Divine name is formed by the union of the two! There is power in a biblical union as you choose a proper spouse. However, there is only FIRE waiting for you and your children if you choose selfishly! Choose wisely!
Shabbat Shalom Mishpocha,
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Shalom Aleichem